•illuminate•

“The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.”
Psalm‬ ‭18‬:‭2‬

today was my last day of high school classes. strange feelings come and go. one moment it starts to sink in the another moment i still have more high school to finish. 

the emotions of these last two months have been amazingly crazy. it seemed like most days were spent in fear and hopelessness. i believe i even fell into some depression. these feelings are still sometimes strong but talking about them with my loving mom and spending time in God’s Word have helped me. 

i wonder if having these feelings were caused because i was denying the fact that all this change was coming my way. outwardly i was telling myself i wasn’t gonna be affected. pride much? oh how wrong i was. God works in many ways and i believe He has been using my very low moments to push me to trust Him. and i think what He’s teaching me is that its not just a one time thing, its an every day, sometimes ever hour and sometimes every minute thing saying-Lord i trust you, i give you myself. in chapel and in Bible class i heard something that changed my perspective of the Holy Spirit- the Holy Spirit has already given all of Himself to you once you are His child. we are the ones who must give all of ourselves to our gracious loving Creator and Savior. its denying ourselves and choosing to let God take the reins. in His hands are where my problems and fears need to lie. 

Matthew 16:24-26 

″Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.”

Romans 8:38-39 

“For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

1 Peter 5:6-7

“Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time He may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on Him, because He cares for you. 

“Have you not known? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; His understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might He increases strength.”
Isaiah‬ ‭40‬:‭28-29‬❤️

“For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.” ‭Ephesians‬ ‭2‬:‭8-9‬